23 More People You Meet at a Christian College

Candace Lowry, a writer for Buzzfeed, just posted a list of “23 People You Meet at a Christian College.” I was impressed by her accuracy (I could still give you #19’s name and major, fourteen years after Calvin) but, on Twitter, found myself adding a bit to the record… and getting, toward the end, a little mushy in the process. 

1. The Professor Who Cannot Get Out of Bed Without Quoting Walker Percy About It

2. The Bros For Whom Bible Study, Accountability Partnership, and Powerlifting Fuse Into One XTreme Activity

3. The Guy Who Writes Into the Christian Feminism Listserv To Talk About “Modesty”

4. The Person Who Has a Weird Dream About Marrying a Near-Stranger and Figures It’s a Divine Message

5. The Worship Leader Who Clings Pathetically To Any Scrap of Evidence That Bono Still Believes

6. The Incredibly and Justifiably Frustrated Diversity Coordinator

7. The Chaplain Who You Can Tell Kinda Wants to Give Gay People a Break, Already, But Can’t Quite Manage

8. The Protestant Who Wants To Be Catholic So Bad It Hurts

9. The Horny, Guilty Demivierge

10. The Person Who Quotes Paul on Church Unity To Win Every Single Argument

11. The Person Who Quotes Marilynne Robinson Way Too Much (Oh, Shit, That’s Me)

12. The Person Who Just Came Back from Guatemala And Gets Mad When You Run the Hot Water

13. The Woman Who Kissed Dating Goodbye

14. The Couple That Reads Elizabeth Elliott Together

15. The Dormful of Guys Who Play Weirdly Homoerotic Tackling-Based Games At Night

16. The Biblical and Systematic Theologians Who Get Along Like the Jets and the Sharks

(…And, switching gears a bit):

17. The Lit Professor Who Has Tons of Work To Do But Instead Spends the Whole Afternoon Saving Your Life

18. The Missionary Kid Who Patiently Explains To You Why American Hegemony Sucks

19. The Math Prof Who Starts Every Class With Prayer, and It’s Actually Really Sweet

20. The Philosophy Prof Who is Smarter Than Every Snarky Atheist On the Internet

21. The Econ Prof Who Lives On Sixty Percent of His Income and Gives the Rest to Charity

22. The Lone Feminist In Every Department Who Patiently Endures in Well Doing

23. The Professoriate That Views You as a Whole Person and Not an “Education Consumer”

One response to “23 More People You Meet at a Christian College

  1. Despite my best intentions No. 1 is almost certainly going to be me if I ever get back to teaching; I can only hope that not drinking and not being from the south will give me a few good years before my final development into a terrifying caricature of myself.

    No. 5 has an exciting future as “Worship Leader Who Clings Pathetically To Any Scrap of Evidence That Sufjan Stevens Still Believes”

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